What does the term BDSM conjure up for you? Whips and chains? Weird people in masks in dark basements?

Although the Fifty Shades of Grey trilogy has enjoyed blockbuster success and helped to bring BDSM into the mainstream, many people hold plenty of misconceptions about it, and may still equate kinky sex with perversion, weirdness, even abuse. 

Adherents of the sexy acronym would like you to know otherwise, and they’ve got some compelling science to back them up.

BDSM, or Bondage, Discipline, Dominance, Submission, Sadism & Masochism, has been around in some form since the ancient Greeks, but seems to be enjoying a surge in popularity in recent years. According to a survey by Durex, a whopping thirty-six percent of US adults use blindfolds, bondage tools or other such toys during sex, and many others are engaging in role-playing and fantasy to spice things up in the bedroom. 

The essence of the majority of this type of activity involves an element of power-play and control, where one partner is more submissive to or dominant over the other. As a result, the interactions generally require a high degree of trust, negotiation, and communication as compared to more ‘vanilla’ or non-kinky sex. 

Dr. Sandra LaMorgese, a professional dominatrix and holistic practitioner living in New York City, believes BDSM can actually help couples relax and bond. “During BDSM sessions, clients often experience a release of dopamine and serotonin, the brain’s feel-good neurotransmitters. These two chemicals are associated with feelings of happiness, tranquility, joy, self-confidence, emotional well-being, and motivation. In addition, the release of the chemical vasopressin compels people toward feeling bonded to one another” she says.

Could Kinky Sex Improve your Relationship? by Mike Bundrant

Oct. 10th, 2018